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Anonymous or Known Donor?
Feb 2, 2009
Anonymous or Known Donor?
If you’ve decided on the donor sperm path to parenthood, your next step is choosing a donor. This can be an arduous, yet exciting step. Do I want a donor who’s tall, dark, and handsome, one who is interested in books and baseball?
Anonymous Donor
Perhaps a more important question is whether the donor is willing to reveal his identity to your child. Many potential parents want their children to have the option of meeting their biological father. Others don’t believe this is important. Most sperm banks recruit donors who agree to become “known” to their potential children when they turn 18. Currently, sperm donors can remain anonymous but regulations often change, as more ‘adult children of donor sperm’ are demanding their right to know.
Known Donor
Another question to consider is whether a friend or relative might be a good donor. If, for instance, your partner’s brother or cousin agrees to be your sperm donor, you’ll both then have a biological connection to Baby. With known donors, your child can know his/her biological dad — and they can have a lifelong connection. Of course, you and the donor must explore this at length, including the degree of involvement you both envision. And remember, people’s expectations differ and their motivations can change over time. Your donor may be interested in remaining in contact now but if he has a family later on, this may change.
If you tap a known donor, realize that he must undergo the same testing that sperm banks require, including tests for HIV, AIDS, and other communicable diseases. In the U.S., the FDA regulates sperm banks, and the EU has its own regulations, but each bank operates slightly differently.
Tied to these questions is whether you will tell your potential child about his/her biological origins. You may want to meet with a counselor experienced in third-party reproduction or join a support group to explore all of these issues.
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Pros of using a known Donor
You know who he is: his health, family history, physical and mental health, characteristics and personality.
He might be open to being involved in the child's life.
You don't have to pay for the sperm, although you may have to pay a doctor to inseminate you.
Cons of using a known Donor
The biggest con of using a known donor is that he may sue for visitation or custody of the child.
There is a risk of HIV, AIDS or other sexually transmitted diseases.
If the donor chooses to stay involved in the child's life, issues around parenting can come up.
If you are a lesbian thinking of becoming pregnant via artificial insemination, it is wise to seek out the advice of an attorney.
artificial insemination
I'll have to admit there are some pretty interesting options on sperm donation. I hope I'll never have to need a donor sperm but if I will, I would probably want it to be anonymous, leaving the option available for my child when he becomes an adult.
I have to admit that I have been searching for this information for a long time. Reading this wonderful entry I have known many new things about the sperm donor, which I have not known before. As I see all your articles are informative and full of valuable information so I will definitely bookmark your website and wait for more such great posts like this one. So huge thanks for publishing this article here, without you I would never known about such a thing ever. Regards, Adam from kjøpe 100mg uten resept
i just want to k ow how i can go about getting sperm and the cost of everything so my wife and i can have this baby we dreamed to have. please someone help me
I would like to find out more infomation regarding anonymous sperm donation. My partner is not able to father a child as we feel that this would be the best option for us - any help would be appreciated.
My husband has been asked by a very dear friend of his to be his donor, but I feel intensely uncomfortable with that. He already has a kid with his ex, and we are trying to have our own. I just feel that is too much for our children to explain who all the relatives are. The friend wants the kid to know my husband as "uncle".
I have a couple of friends that have gone the known donor way, and both cases the donor has become very involved and attached to the child. Now is worth to mention that these donors are not married and both are gay, so they are not planning on having a family of their own.
I am too selfish for opposing this situation? I have read abou the issues with known donors, and I have not yet come across any article that mentions the donors' wife. As I write this, I realize that my issue might not be what I thought it was.
Just to clarify- the friend is a lesbian, and her partner will be having the baby.
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