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C'mon J-Lo!
Did you hear what Jennifer Lopez said recently? According to an interview promoting her new movie, The Back Up Plan about a driven single woman who uses in vitro fertilization (IVF) to have a baby, Jennifer would never ever ever do the same.
"'I just felt like you don't mess with things like that," she's quoted as saying in this article. "I also believe in God and I have a lot of faith in that, so I just felt like you don't mess with things like that."
Thing is, rumors abound that J-Lo conceived her own fraternal twins at 39 through infertility treatments.
Of course nobody knows for sure and stars like Courtney Cox, Celine Dion and Sarah Jessica Parker who 'fess up to fertility troubles aren't the norm. Instead we're supposed to believe that Hollywood stars are not only thinner, prettier and more talented than we are but they also possess super fertility powers that let them get knocked up, no problem, even when they're past their prime.
On the other hand, nobody knows better than we do that it's not easy to come out of the infertility closet and in perfection-obsessed Hollywood the pressure may be even worse.
So what do you think? Should actors come clean and help de-stigmatize infertility? Or do they have a right to pretend the current wave of fraternal twins in Hollywood has nothing to do with the RE's office?
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Comments
Interesting. So, J-Lo
Interesting. So, J-Lo thinks that IVF is un-Godly? Was it the IVF or the single-mom choice? Personally, I think the "Single Moms" of Hollywood / Obscene Money are bad role models. Not that single parents are bad role models. But, and I am NOT a parent but I know plenty, it sure seems like a 2-person job, at least.
The 'bad role model' part ... See Moreis that too many times it seems the single parent has a personal assistant, a couple of nannies, sometimes a chef, an agent, a business manager, etc etc. Being a single parent with a pile of resources is certainly much easier than if you have to work 50 hours a week to hope to feed, clothe and house you and yours. Tangent complete.
Generally, I don't care what a star/athlete/singer/etc. says about how to live life. Usually, the ones you hear about are NOT one on whom you would want to model your life. Finally, if J-Lo is so against this, why do the movie? I guess it seems she ends up not single at the end?
Well, there are people who
Well, there are people who think that IVF is "ungodly", and, it's absolutely fine for them to *not* have fertility treatments. But, if they did, they certainly shouldn't lie about it.
I don't know what this means for J-Lo, since we can't know her private medical history. I do not think actors have the obligation to tell us those things. But, I think they have an obligation not to lie. If they want to say "no comment" when asked about fertility treatments, that's their right. They do not have an obligation to contribute to the public conversation and education about fertility. But, they have an obligation not to contaminate and mislead.
Amazing. People just have
Amazing. People just have their heads in the sand when it is convenient for them. And still I'm skeptical about her pregnancy, no matter what she claims.
I don't feel obligated to
I don't feel obligated to share my fertility status with others, and maybe famous folk don't want condolences from random people in line at the Beverly Hills Starbucks.
Additionally, I think celebrities who conceive via donor eggs or embryos may (rightly or wrongly) fear breaches of privacy the rest of us wouldn't have to worry about. I can see the Us Weekly headlines now "Coco Cox-Arquette's Biological Mother Speaks Out on How it Feels to Have an Anorexic Raising Your Baby!!!"
So, I think it's fine for celebs to offer no comment. It'd be great for others if they'd come out of the closet about it, but I can't feel like they're obligated to.
But as for J.Lo, referring, even obliquely, to particular methods as reflecting a lack of faith seems based in ignorance, or at least a pretty limited interpretation of what God intends. I'm guessing JLo had her kids immunized with antibodies that God didn't give them? She flies them around the world on wings God didn't provide? Why draw the line at IVF, then?
I already wrote my thoughts
I already wrote my thoughts on J-Lo's comment on my blog:
http://thepregnantyuppy.blogspot.com/2010/01/celebrities-infertility.html
In my opinion all women are entitled to privacy. Infertility is a medical condition and it's nobody's business. However, most people are pretty open about other conditions (e.g. diabetes, heart disease, even chicken pox). I think that more women would be more likely to be open about their infertility if there wasn't a stigma attached to it.
We've all heard hurtful comments like "if God wanted you to have children then you would have children". It's because of comments like that that most of us stay infertility closeted.
I know that many celebs do come forward, but the media seems to ignore it. I'd love to hear a few of them come our of the closet and announce their infertility.
Unfortunately infertility treatments have even gotten a bad name thanks to people like Ocotmom.