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Surrogacy

Surrogacy, also known as gestational care, is a family building option for those who want a child with genetic ties and have not had success with other “first-line” assisted reproductive technology (ART) treatments. Surrogacy, in which a woman carries and gives birth to another woman’s baby, has a long history, dating back as far as the Old Testament story of Sarah and Hagar.

Traditional Surrogates and Gestational Surrogates

There are two types of surrogacy — traditional and gestational — that are practiced today.

In traditional surrogacy, a woman, called a “surrogate mother,” carries an embryo that was created with her own egg and the sperm of a man who, with his partner, wants a baby. Traditional surrogacy can be accomplished either by intrauterine insemination (IUI) or by in vitro fertilization (IVF).

In gestational surrogacy, the surrogate, called a gestational carrier, gives birth to a baby created with an egg and sperm from the "intended parents," or the embryo can be created from a donor egg or donor sperm. The majority of surrogates today are gestational carriers.

With gestational surrogacy, IVF is used to fertilize the eggs in a laboratory. If the fertilization is successful, a fertility doctor transfers some or all of the resulting embryos (often two or three) into to the surrogate’s uterus. If all goes well, the gestational carrier delivers the baby and immediately relinquishes him or her to the parent(s).

IVF, which came into practice in 1978, transformed surrogacy into a popular practice today.

Who Uses Surrogacy?

Candidates for surrogacy are:

  • Couples and single women who have had multiple miscarriages or difficulty conceiving and/or carrying a fetus to term. Surrogacy enables them to have a child genetically related to one or both.
  • Gay male couples who want a child with a genetic connection to one partner.
  • Couples or single women in which the woman has no uterus or a congenital anomaly of her uterus but has intact ovaries.

What to Consider with Surrogacy

Surrogacy involves many legal, ethical and financial considerations. Usually, potential parents pay the surrogate a fee for carrying the child, along with her medical expenses. Costs can start at $20,000 or more, up to $120,000. Legal contracts are required before the process begins to protect the rights and responsibilities of the parents, surrogate, and intended child. Both the third party and intended parents should have separate legal counsel.

Finding a Surrogate

Most people locate gestational carriers/surrogates through fertility clinics, websites, lawyers and private agencies. Most agencies require that potential surrogates already have had a child/children of their own, are healthy medically and emotionally, and are not motivated solely by financially considerations.

Comments

I just want to know if ISCI is a procedure only done with IVF or can it be done alone?

I'm 48 and my husband is 49 we both have children from previous marriages but none together. We have been married 19 years and my heart hurts to have a child together. I can't because I had my tubes tied and then a hysterectomy in 2002 but I still have my ovaries could it still be possible for my eggs and my husbands sperm be used with a surrogate?

Hi Pam, Once you have had an Ovarian Reserve test (Follicle Stimulating Hormone and Anti Mullerian Hormone) the fertility doctor will let you know if you are able to use your own eggs with a surrogate to conceive. Otherwise, you may use donor eggs with your husband's sperm and a surrogate. Give us a call at 1-855-955-BABY (2229) and we can help you connect with a reputable fertility doctor. Best, Kim

If I am 45 and perimenopausal can my eggs be implanted into a gestational surrogate?

Hi Terry -- I would encourage you to talk to your doctor about your options. It may be that surrogacy with donor egg (or your own pregnancy with donor egg) would be a better bet but it depends on a lot of factors. Good luck! ------ Need help with our site? Contact me at claire@fertilityauthority.com. I'm happy to help!

Frankly, I don't know if I could get involved in a situation of this type. I would like to feel how the child is growing inside of me. But, of course, if I couldn't conceive I would have this option in my mind too..

I'm 42 years old and when I was 23 I had my tubes tide. Otherwise everything is good. I have two living childrens, I have always wanted to help those who can not have the joy of having a child for health or other reasons. But my questions is would a person like me be able to carry a child having my tubes tied?

Hi, You can be a Gestational Surrogate when you have your tubes tied. I would get checked out first by a fertility doctor to get a professional opinion if he thinks you are healthy to carry. How old is your youngest child if you don`t mind me asking? Usually after the age of 35, a Reproductive Endocrinologist is a bit lerey unless you have had a child in the last 1-2 years. Best of luck to you though!

my daughter can not have a child because of a heart condition. He mother is 55, in good health, can she carry the baby if in good health. Is there an age limit where it is not safe

Generally there is an age limit for surrogates - for many programs the cutoff is 40. If your daughter is interested in using a surrogate, she should contact an agency or attorney in her area who handles surrogacy agreements, as well as schedule an appointment with a reproductive endocrinologist - or fertility specialist - to understand what her options are.

I realize this is several years old, but there are MANY of us gest. surrogate's who are in our 40's and the RE's have no issue w/it. The same concern for a woman carrying her own pg in her 40's is different when it comes to surrogacy. I have a woman on my boards now whose mother (mid-50's) is carrying her own grandchild right now. There is much, much more to being approved to carry a surrogate pg than age.

i had my tubes tied when i was 24 (2000) now i regret it and would like to have another child i am now 34, i have 2 chidren 13 and 9 . what are my options generally? reversing the tubel or artifical?

One my friend can't have children (medical error during the operation), but she want a big family with a lot of children. Can you advise her what method to choose?

Your friend should contact a fertility specialist - or reproductive endocrinologist who can help her determine what her options are for having a family. There is a Find A Doctor search on every page of www.fertilityauthority.com.

If you are interested in becoming a surrogate, you should contact an agency or attorney in your area who manages surrogacy arrangements. They can advise you on all aspects of becoming a surrogate, including eligibility requirements you would need to meet and testing (medical and psychological) that you'd need to undergo. Good luck!

I am about to use a gestational carrier in a couple weeks. She is 42. Is there any implications on the pregnancy if she is over 40? It will be a frozen embryo (29 yr old egg and 32 yr old sperm. Thanks.

Hi dear, I am leaving in africa, I am 42, I can not have children due to a hysterectomy that I had 2 years ago due to massive myomata. my ovaries are intact and in a relatively good working order. I know you guys might help me, please reply at the abovementioned e-mail address and tell me were can I start. A desperate mother to be.

I am 45 and want to have a child my tubes have healed in part but will need a sparm donor. I feel that I can carry them am looking to have twins if possible. And would like to know how much this would cost for the preceger and I would like to know what nationalitys can we choose from for the sparm.

Can I be a surrogate to my self I mean , can I be the carrier for a egg donnor and my husband? the doctors can not find nothing wrong on me or my husband. How much does this cost?

I am 44 years old. I have had 5 children of my own and am in excellent health. I enjoy pregnancy and feel good when I am pregnant. My husband had a vasectomy 8 years ago as we decided we were done having children. I would love to help a couple to be able to have and enjoy their own child. My only concern at this point would be if I would be considered as to old?

I'm a lesbian and me and my girlfriend want to carry each others egg just to have that special connection with the child b/c its the closest way to ever being considered the child's parent b/c whom the child is birth by, is this be possible??

I dont believe that thats possible becausr the Mans sperm is what makes up the baby. A females eggs just set there waiting to be fertalized..

Don't think that is what she meant there.... I am wondering similarly, can I carry my girlfriends egg and have that fertilized instead of my own? I am sure we all realise the necessity of sperm...

Hi Fuschia, Yes, that is possible. If you'd like to connect with a fertility doctor who specializes in reproductive options for same-sex couples, give us a call at 1-855-955-BABY (2229) and we can help you connect with a fertility doctor in your area. Best, Kim

Hi, My name is Angel. I want to be a surrogate mom. How do I go about. I am single and want to have my own child, same time help a couple also have one. Guide me. Anyone wants a surrogate mother, contact me on reetej2006@gmail.com

hi, my name is eshal, i got married 3 times in 10 yeas, but still i couldn't concive. y i mean i went meny gayniz nd thay say that i am absoulty fine n i will have baby hopfuly. but my qustion is y couldnt i have it so far, now i'm tired of all the treatments nd i wanna go fot test tube baby. please reply me ASAP. yeah my husband's reports r normal. soo what should i do, im so confused. please replu?

hi, my name is Eshal Rizwan, i am 25 yeas old nd my husband is also 25 yeas old, as i have told u above that i got maried to the third man in 10 years, nd i never conceived, my husband's repots r normal, as i went to many Gaynacoligests every one says that im perfectly fine, nd i will conceive hopefully. i also had lapars copy surgary also again my repots r normal. honestly speaking now im fedup of all the treatments nd i wanna straight go for a TEST TUBE baby. i live in Karachi PAKISTAN. so please sugest me something good, i'm soooo confused of my life bcoz otherwise my husband will remarry, nd he'll leave me. please reply me ASAP. THANK YOU!!!

I am 46 years old and my wife is 43. we have 17 years old daughter. We had a still born boy (3.5 kg) on the last day. This was during year 2006. After a year my wife had a blind pregnacy which had to be terminated. She could not concieve after that incident. We feel that nothing in life but another child could help us. What is the way forward?

Nice share. I appreciate this wonderful place that you have provided us. Great site and a good argument and I'm really surprised to read this. Thanks for your hard work!

I would like to know all the advantages and disadvantages of fertility drug.....

I have someone who is willing to carry/deliver a child for me with a sperm donor. She is 41 but has a 13 month old child. Her doctor said she is perfectly healthy to do this. But, another woman, much younger and related to me offered to donate one of her eggs for us to use , just to be on the safe side of not having any health problems with an older woman carrying the child, even though she has a healthy young child and a teen ager as well. I was thrilled because with this person, my relative, it is almost as if I'm using one of my own eggs, which if I could, I would in a heartbeat. I'm sure there are many ethical issues involved, but, if I was going to have this woman use a donor sperm and there were no problems with that, and it being her biological child that she will have for me..........why should there be a problem with using an egg/eggs of my relative to have fertalized and then put into the surrogates uterus. Is it much more difficult than it sounds? It sounds like the best plan and all of us are on board with it so why should legal, ethical matters stop me from having a child that will have direct gentic ties to me since it would be a relative donating the egg?? Sorry for such a long ? ...it is difficult to put into writing.

It was really nice to study your post. I collect some good points here.

Hi. im looking in the future to have a baby with my girlfriend im 34 yrs old and have two healthy boys already and never have i said i would not have anymore. were so happy and have a strong relationship, except we would really love to have a child together, except my partner feels more of a man and would not feel right carrying a child, even though she could and so much would like to have a child not only for her, us but for her parents it would be the best ever news to have a child and the support and love we would get would be out of this world. so we have a donor but what i want to know is how do i go about getting my girlfriends egg in to me so its her baby but me carrying and giving birth. in our eyes it would be our child and the donor is happy to not be apart of this as he has 3 children of his own and would love to do this for us. your reply would be great. I live in great Britain. i have asked my doctor and he has said to check this out, as not sure if can be done on the nhs. and if i had to go private how much would this cost and where do i go? just so i know. thanks

Ok so here is my questions(s) I am in a lesbian relationship. What we would like is to have me be the surrogate. I would have my partners egg and a donor sperm. So then what's the cost of that? Since there are no surrogate fees because it's me?

Hi mamaS - Many fertility clinics work with lesbian couples in the same situation as you - using partner's sperm and donor egg. In this case it's not considered surrogacy - it's considered "<a href=http://www.fertilityauthority.com/your-fertility/family-building-options-gays-and-lesbians/reciprocal-ivf-lesbians>reciprocal IVF</a>" or "Partner IVF". You should start by <a href=http://www.fertilityauthority.com/clinics/findnearme> contacting fertility clinics near you</a> to find out if they are GLBT friendly and setting up a consultation. If you'd like any more info, please let me know. Best, Claire

I am 33 years old, been married for 16 years and have children of my own, i feel like my family is complete, however i believe that i am healthy enough to continue to give life and have a strong desire to help others who are wanting to become parents but are unable to, i have been thinking about becoming a surrogate for many years, i am finally ready to take the first steps and want to find the right family, while i research this i want to make myself known to potential families.

Hi Lovelymommy - You should start by contacting fertility clinics or surrogacy agencies in your area to see what their requirements are for surrogates. It's important that you with an surrogacy agency or fertility clinic that will handle or facilitate all the necessary medical, psychological and legal portions of a surrogacy arrangement. It's a wonderful gift that you would like to give a family. All the best. Claire

Me nd my girlfriend want to have a baby ... i want the baby to have her genes as well as mine ... ive heard about the bone marrow thing when ctors can turn her bone marrow into sperm ... does it work ??? I also wantrd to kno if she gives Me her eggs will her eggs give the baby her genes ?? ...

Hi Sunshine, The technology to combine DNA from two eggs is (as far as I know) something that is still being tested in laboratory studies. Here is a link to a <a href="http://www.fertilityauthority.com/news/2012/oct/26/one-dad-two-moms-using-donor-dna-prevent-disease">study that combines DNA from an intended mother and a "donor"</a>. What I've found is that many lesbian couples will either take the eggs from one partner, use donor sperm, and have the other partner carry the baby OR you could both have your eggs retrieved and fertilized with donor sperm and (depending on egg and embryo quality) transfer one of each of your embryos. Both of these involve IVF, which may or may not be covered by your health insurance. Give us a call at 855-955-2229 for more info and we can connect you with a fertility doctor in your area. Kim

I have a good friend who is 21,smart, has a 146 IQ and just stunning to look at. She is willing donate however many eggs I need. Then I have another friend who is 38 and volunteered to carry the baby. My question is I am 55 and HIV+. I know they can do sperm cleansing for the HIV, but what about my age.Also I am in excellent shape.O viral load and T cells near 1000. Can I make this happen?

Hi Dave, Your age could affect your fertility, but I would first suggest having a semen analysis done. You will have to work with a fertility clinic to do the IVF and gestational surrogate process. They can talk to you more about sperm washing (which I've read reduces the risk, but I'm not sure it completely eliminates the risk of transmitting HIV). You can give us a call at 1-855-955-BABY (2229) to find a fertility doctor in your area who specializes in gestational surrogacy. Best, Kim

I AM 27, PEAK FERTILITY, I HAVE HAD TWO CHILDREN OF MY VERY OWN, I AM NOT MARRIED NOR AM I IN A RELATIONSHIP. MY PREGNANCIES WERE A PEICE OF CAKE AND SINCE I AM NOT HAVING ANYMORE AND FEEL AS THOUGH GOD HAS CALLED ME TO SURROGACY I WOULD LOVE TO HELP. PLEASE CONTACT ME IF YOU WANT TO HAVE A BIG FAT BABY CONTACT ME 214079104051 HEATHER

Hi, my husband and I would like to have another child. I can't but he can. Where are you located?

I was born with no overys or uterus my howl life iv known I can't have kids iv just lived with that but I am desperate to be a mother. I'm 44 I have a stable relationship of three years and he would love to be a father my biggest consern with the suragusy situation is that I will not be genetically related to my potenchial child and if I'm not is it my child. Is there no technology out there that would allow a child to have my DNA I know it sounds a bit silly but that is the point right passing on your DNA It fritens me as I have no understanding where I stand looking into the future. Should I just give up completely before I loos my mind.

Hi Desperate, I am so sorry you are dealing with this decision. It is definitely a tough one and only you can decide if surrogacy is right for you. I know many women say that the moment they hold a baby in their arms, it does not matter that the baby is not genetically related to them. If you are interested in working with a fertility clinic in your area that specializes in surrogacy, give us a call at 1-855-955-BABY (2229). Best, Kim

Hi there. I am 45 years old and have three healthy children of my own. I have a friend who has tried every other route to have a baby, but they just can't conceive anymore. I am in perfect health and have healthy pregnancies. Should my age deter them from using me as a surrogate?

Hi Shelley, Age can impact your ability to get pregnant and carry the pregnancy to term, but really only a fertility doctor can tell you if your hormone levels and anatomy of your uterus can sustain a pregnancy for your friend. Give us a call at 1-855-955-BABY (2229) or email carecoordinator@fertilityauthority.com and we can help you and your friend work with a fertility clinic that specializes in third party reproduction. Best, Kim

I am a 24 year old lesbian and me and my partner want a child i wanted for hers and a sperm doners egg put in me. Any advice?

Hi Kay, That is definitely possible. Give us a call at 1-855-955-BABY (2229) or email carecoordinator@fertilityauthority.com and we can help you connect with a fertility doctor who specializes in working with same sex couples. Best, Kim

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