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Becoming a Surrogate Parent

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by Theresa Ferrara, California Case Manager, The Surrogacy SOURCE, July 28, 2011

When my wife asked me what I thought about having a baby for another couple who couldn’t have children on their own, I was reluctant at first. However, after hearing the stories of parents who were unable to have kids on their own, I became more open to surrogacy.

As we moved forward, I wasn’t sure what to expect. I knew very little of the whole process. But I quickly caught on to an amazing experience that has helped thousands of couples across the globe fulfill their dreams of having children.

My wife loves being pregnant, but we are done having children of our own, so it worked out for her because it satisfied her love for babies. We were just happy knowing that someone else would be able to complete their family.

The first few months were a bit challenging. For us, I think the fertility drug injections were hardest at first, but as the months went on, things seemed to smooth out, and it became much easier. Learning the best ways to do an injection, how to hold the skin, putting an icepack on the injection site beforehand. All the little tricks made it easier and easier as we moved forward.

After the embryo transfer, my wife was on bed rest for two days, so she stayed at a hotel near the fertility clinic. Honestly, I think she enjoyed the quiet time alone, but my children and I missed her.

As the months rolled along, it became more and more real to us and our children what was happening. It was amazing that were getting to experience this first hand. I felt lucky to be a part of the whole surrogate parenting process.

When the day came for my wife to go to the hospital, it was a little unreal because we knew that we weren’t coming home with a baby. We were not sad at all. We had worked through all our feelings before the experience began and were prepared for this. But somehow it was still unreal.

Seeing the new mother holding her child for the first time was amazing. She cried and held the baby. She stood rocking it back and forth, whispering quiet words in its ear. Words that I will never know, but I can imagine. My wife and I were privileged to hold the baby as well. Looking down at this tiny infant, I knew that this baby would be loved. I know what it is like to hold my own baby for the first time, and I felt the love. I felt the love in the room that day when the new Mother held her baby. I knew then that we had made a good decision. A decision that helped a family grow!

Theresa Ferrara, Case Manager for Southern California, brings a wealth of knowledge and first-hand experience to her position for The Surrogacy SOURCE. Having been a two-time Gestational Surrogate Mother herself, she served as a support group leader and mentor for other Gestational Surrogates going through the process with The Surrogacy SOURCE. Theresa’s sincerity and empathy shines through in her desire to guide Intended Parents and Surrogates through this wonderful journey. Theresa is passionate about working diligently to ensure all parties enjoy a smooth surrogacy process and delivery.

Comments (2)

It's great to hear a story like this from the eyes of the surrogate's spouse. This gift that his wife gave is the most precious gift you can give to another person. I truly enjoyed hearing his side of the entire process. Perhaps it will help inspire other husbands to create room in their relationship if their wives wish to become surrogates.

D Alishouse

This has been posted on behalf of the Indianapolis fertility clinic, American Health Network reproductive medicine, expert Reproductive Endocrinologists in Indianapolis. The information is not medical advice, and should not be treated as such. It is not intended nor implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice. The reader should always consult his or her healthcare provider to determine the appropriateness of the information for their own situation or if they have any questions regarding a medical condition or treatment plan.

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