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Sharing the Intimate Details of Infertility

a blog by Marc Sedaka, December 17, 2013

Last week my husband shared our most intimate fertility details with his poker buddies and then pleaded ignorance when I told him not to do that. Shouldn’t he have known something that basic without me having to tell him?

Not really. In fact, my wife would share her infertility struggles with anyone who would listen. That was how she coped. That’s what worked for her. So in order for your husband to fully understand your needs, you’re first going to have to tell him what they are. Now granted, he could always make the first overture, but you know he won’t. Very few men will. Especially when it comes to a subject as downright uncomfortable as this one. So if you’d rather he not share intimate details with other people (his mother for example) let him know. If you’re feeling particularly scared and helpless about something, let him know. If you really don’t want to go to his friend’s wife’s fourth child’s baby shower, for heaven’s sake let him know! More often than not, he’ll be happy to comply, but he won’t even have that chance if the lines of communication aren’t open.


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