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A Visit to the Maternity Floor

a blog by Ellen Glazer, July 8, 2013

I just returned from a visit to the maternity floor. I was there to welcome a baby boy that I have “known” in some ways for over a year but who was born only yesterday. When I say that I’ve “known” him, I’m remembering the conversations his mother and I had over several months as she decided whether to try egg donation. I’m recalling when she met her first donor and was floating on air with excitement. And then there was the cycle that failed and the news that her donor, a wonderful person, was infertile. On to another donor, whom my client (and I) liked even more, A successful pregnancy. The news it was a boy. Yesterday an email, “I’m on my way to the hospital!!” And today, Jonah.

Seeing my client and her newborn son was both an extraordinary and an ordinary experience. It was extraordinary because I knew all that went into Jonah’s conception and birth. It was “ordinary” in that what I saw in the hospital was mother and baby. The woman who had worried that she would feel different—perhaps “not quite a real mom”—if she had a baby through egg donation, was holding her infant like an experienced mom. The mom that had been hesitant to meet her donor for fear “that I’ll always see her face in my child” turned to me and said, “He sure doesn’t look like Samantha (donor). I’m so glad I met her because I’d be wondering.” And the woman who had cried in my office a year earlier, fearing that egg donation would turn out to be yet another “disappointment and failure” was radiant with happiness and pride. As I was leaving she gave a hug and declared with a big smile, “I did it didn’t I. I really did it!” And indeed she did.


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