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Friends & Fertility
a blog by Fran Meadows, December 14, 2012
Many that go through infertility might not look back at the road they’ve traveled. Some never forget, like me. I find it hard to travel the road of infertility over and over again. Yes, it’s much different when you’re not going through it but you feel the ups and downs with many. The pain you once felt is now affecting someone else and you can’t take it away.
After my book The Truth Behind The Secret “Infertility” was published many women have contacted me for support through my website. With friends going through fertility treatments and others I’ve met through online support chats, I find it hard not to forget. I find it hard not to reflect or travel that road again with online friends or life-long friends. It brings back many emotions, the good, the bad and the ugly memories that I can relate to.
I feel the pain when hearing about the reactions to medications or to the injections or hearing the BFN (Big Fat Negatives) or experiencing the emotions associated with the two week wait or hearing that there are medical issues or male fertility factors….I can just go on and on. I don’t forget the road I traveled and how I made it where I am now with my son through IVF.
With that I now try to offer as much support as I can to get others through, hoping that they will make it to the end too. I travel their journey through their emotions, doctor’s visits, blood tests, egg retrievals and transfers. It’s so hard not to. The only thing I wish is that I can do is make it all okay, take away their pain that I once felt. Take it all and push it up to the sky bringing down the stork with their baby. Unfortunately, it’s not in my power. I hope not to say the wrong thing or things I hated hearing with the hopes that they know I care.
I do love sharing in the BFP (Big Fat Positives) it is a feeling that nobody can understand unless they traveled this road of uncertainty and what if’s! It is something like no other ….to share in the complete joy and be able to see that person glow from within. It does sadden me though to hear from so many women that get their positive test and they are scared to death wondering how they will be able to enjoy their pregnancy without wondering if something will go wrong. Sometimes it’s hard to believe it’s real. When you experience so much with infertility treatments you will always have that fear, because so many negatives made this positive moment to them. How can you not think about your past? You’re so happy that all you try to do is look ahead to the future. No one knows your story some may block out where they’ve been or just accept where they’re going. Everyone is different and emotions are still flowing until after those nine months pass and their able to hold their little miracle in their arms; that is their future!
I feel blessed to be able to travel with you in your journey, to be able to comfort and support you when you’re down with my words, emails or being able to celebrate and look to the future with you. When you feel unsure just think about my journey, your journey and the many others just starting their journey’s to be able to give you the confidence to build your tomorrow and move forward!