You are here
The 2 Week Wait Sucks
a blog by Genna Banafato, June 12, 2013
I remember when I was naive. Before we were diagnosed and every month I was sure "THIS IS IT". Our timing was always perfect and I would wait, knowing this would be the month I got pregnant. That wait was torture, with every twinge and cramp being overanalyzed. Little did I know, that was nothing. Eventually, we WERE diagnosed and started cycling. That dreaded "two week wait" between ovulation and your period showing up developed a whole new meaning for me.
These are my top 10 reasons why the IVF 2ww sucks:
10. Unlike way back when you were actually just trying to get pregnant "the old fashioned way", you KNOW there are embryos in there. Now you have to spend the next 2 weeks wondering if your body is good enough to keep them there.
9. Wondering if every little thing you're doing is going to impact implantation in some way. My favorite (and you know we have ALL thought this at some point) is wondering if straining at all when going to the bathroom will cause them to get pushed out. Don't lie. You've wondered that too.
8. The phrase "Pregnant Until Proven Otherwise". I'm completely guilty of using it. It's a mindfreak. When the call comes that beta was negative, it almost makes the depression even worse - because for two weeks you were PUPO. And now you're nothing.
7. The bloat. My husband promised me I wasn't that fat all of the time. He said I was just really bloated. He might have lied to me... it would only mean that he's learning.
6. The FLUID. My RE wanted me drinking a MINIMUM of a gallon of liquids a day (preferably mostly juices, electrolyte drinks, etc) to help move the aforementioned bloat. OMG. Between the PIO (progesterone in oil) and the fluid, who can get out of the bathroom?
5. Since I already brought it up, the PIO. Really. An intramuscular injection every day. Don't get me wrong, I'll take it over vaginal suppositories any day of the week, and should a cycle work, we'd all happily bare our rear ends to our husbands every morning for 12 weeks so they can shoot us up. However, by three days in, I was always a member of the painful lumpy butt brigade. It makes me itchy. And honestly, scratching ones rear in public is strongly frowned upon.
4. Okay - more about the PIO. Every 2ww (even the regular plain "old fashioned way" kind) comes with phantom pregnancy symptoms. But seriously, the IVF 2ww comes with those symptoms on steroids. We don't just get the regular NORMAL hormones. We're taking mega doses of them. Voluntarily. Via pill and injection. IVFers are crazy. I'm sure of it.
3. The people you told. Ugh. Each time we do this, we say we're going to tell fewer people. But we never learn and really, the "keeping everything crossed" with huge smiles and "Call me if there's news" gets really old. We get that they're excited too, but can't they just follow our lead? If we're not talking about it, can't they not talk about it too. Don't they know how scary this is? How this isn't just sunshine and daffodils? Don't they remember that it doesn't always work?
2. You're still spending the entire 2ww waiting for the phone to ring. If you have extra embryos and you're waiting to see if they freeze. When you have your progesterone checked. And then when they finally draw your beta HCG.
And the #1 reason why the IVF 2ww sucks is..........
1. The pictures. Unlike when you're trying the old fashioned way, IVFers have a picture of their embryos. Granted, once you have that baby, the embryo shots are surreal. But during the 2ww, you spend the entire time looking at those embryos, wondering what they'll be like or look like. Wondering which one is your baby. And when it doesn't work, you have something tangible to look at and know you lost.
The waiting game is terrible, but we keep doing it with our eyes on the prize. A miracle of modern medicine. Or just for once, for a second line to show up, when you're used to seeing nothing but that stark white window.
It will be worth it.