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Goldilocks and the Three In Vitros
a blog by Jay Pal, March 29, 2011
As you know from reading last week’s entry, we decided to see a new fertility doctor to get another opinion on our reproductive organs. This will make this our third reproductive endocrinologist (RE), and much to my surprise, I think I may have finally found the one that I like the best so far. The first one was a mess. The second one wasn’t attentive enough, but the third one may be just right.
Yes, I’m an infertile Goldilocks.
One of the things that impressed me the most was how much I had set my mind NOT to change fertility doctors, so you know the third one had to be very compelling to make me break-up with my latest RE. What sold me was something so simple that we so easily forget: She actually seemed like she was listening and taking into account what our issues specifically might be!
Imagine that? She wasn’t just trying to get a couple with fertility issues pregnant! She was trying to get my husband and me pregnant. How crazy is that? It’s a sad statement really that in today’s world, we are blown away with what doctors should be doing all along: Looking through your medical records, paying attention and thinking of ways to help you out with whatever issue you’re dealing with.
Does 'The Third Time's the Charm' Work with IVF?
It’s fitting to me that this will be our third in vitro fertilization, and we’re going to do it with our third doctor.
They always say the "third time is the charm," but I’m not sure if I’ve ever bought that. I mean, I had three inseminations, but the third one didn’t work. Really, who came up with "the third time is the charm?" For Celine Dion apparently, the fifth IVF was the charm. It just doesn’t have as nice of a ring to it.
The Moral of the Story
On the surface, the moral of Goldilocks and The Three Bears seems to be that you should respect each other’s privacy or, at the very least, don’t touch what isn’t yours. I’ve heard some say that the moral is to make sure you lock the door before you leave, but really, if they were going for that angle, they would have made the intruder far worse than a little girl with blonde hair that has a fondness for porridge. She’s no Jack, the Ripper.
To me, and I realize I may be alone in this, it’s about looking at all your options and deciding on what works best for you. I guess I just relate more to Goldilocks than I do the bears. Look, the mama bear has a kid, a home and a husband. What does she have to worry about? Her house being a mess? My house is a mess all the time. You don’t see me threatening to eat wayward little girls.
The thing is, I don’t relish doing a third in vitro fertilization. I know all the cool kids are doing it these days, but when I think of starting the whole process again, it’s not one I look forward to with great enthusiasm. I also didn’t enjoy trying to find another fertility doctor, as it means more time away from a day job that’s already pissed at me for taking so much time off due to my fertility conquest. It also means that you’re entrusting your uterus to a person who just met it and has yet to develop a history with it. That can be a little intimidating.
However, my goal is to be a mom, and if this is what it takes, then this is what it takes. Besides, I sincerely like this third fertility doctor. She has a plan that’s different from what we’ve done in the past. She's doing additional tests, adding two new fertility medications to my IVF routine, and she’s tailor-making an IVF with my issues in mind. It goes without saying that I’m desperately hoping this third IVF will be “just right” and I’ll have my own little Goldilocks to love and hold (preferably one that doesn’t break into strange animals' houses.)
If not, and this fails again, I am definitely going to go all Rumpelstiltskin on someone’s ass.