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a blog by liz
I started 2009 with hope. A lot of hope.
After two years with no conception, 2009 was the year that doctors were going to take me seriously; the year that I was going to have medical intervention; the year I thought I’d get pregnant – maybe even give birth.
But it didn’t happened like that.
In January I discovered that I had to go on birth control for six months to try and sort out a dodgy womb lining. So immediately I knew the chances of a 2009 baby had passed. But, I reasoned, I still had every chance of a pregnancy.
My first intrauterine insemination (IUI) wasn’t until August. And I was convinced that this was it, I could just feel it. Unfortunately my psychic powers were non-existent. I wasn’t pregnant.
October marked the second shot at IUI. This time I knew I wasn’t pregnant; unfortunately my psychic powers had clearly sharpened, because I was right.
I am incredibly lucky: Because I live in the U.K., my treatment so far has been funded by the National Health Service – something that, however frustrating it can be on a day-to-day basis, I am incredibly grateful for. But the NHS isn’t a bottomless pit. Thus, my IUI attempts have been limited to every other month and three strikes and I’m out.
So there was a lot riding on December’s final IUI. It was be the last chance for a funded IUI and the last opportunity for conception in 2009.
Two days before Christmas I learnt it hadn’t worked. And I was crushed.
All my hopes for a baby in the first decade of the millennium are now over.
But, it isn’t all bad. It looks likely I will qualify for one NHS-funded round of IVF, a procedure which has a far higher success rate than IUI’s.
So once again, I start 2010 with hope. A lot of hope.