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Choosing a Carrier

Once you have completed an agency’s admissions process, you will be given the profiles of several surrogates. Usually, agencies will offer recommendations based on your individual needs and the availability of surrogates at that time. You have the opportunity to meet your potential surrogate at "match meetings," and decide if she is the right fit for you and your family. The surrogate can use these meetings to get to know you as well.

Women choose to be surrogates for many reasons. Some get a sense of fulfillment by helping others who can’t carry a pregnancy themselves. Others enjoy the unique and magical feeling pregnancy can provide. It takes a special and giving person to make this kind of sacrifice. Although they are compensated financially, most surrogates do not have selfish motives. They want to help you achieve your dreams of having a family.

Medical and Psychological History

The most important issues when determining the suitability of a surrogate are the medical and psychological health of the candidate. Most agencies perform stringent physical and psychological screenings prior to the matching process. It’s helpful to know if she can get pregnant easily. Avoid surrogates who have had gestational diabetes, premature deliveries, or other serious issues. Confirm that she is a non-smoker and has no history of drug or alcohol abuse.

It’s also important for her to be emotionally stable and mature enough to realize that you would be trusting her with the life of your child. It is best if the carrier has children of her own. Then, at the birth, she’s less likely to be conflicted about relinquishing the baby to its parents.

Personal History

Find a surrogate that has a supportive community around her. It’s important that her family and friends agree with what she is doing. There should be an in-depth interview of the surrogate – and her husband, if married – to make sure they are in agreement and understand the impact surrogacy may have on them and their family. They should also be questioned to ensure that they are financially stable with no criminal or bankruptcy history. A surrogate who is offering to carry your child because she is desperate for the money is probably not a good choice.

Your Relationship

It is vital that the relationship with your surrogate is open and supportive. Avoid anonymous surrogacy arrangements. Talk to her on a regular basis and go to her medical appointments with her if you can. Some surrogates become close friends with the family and maintain a relationship with them even after the child is born.

Comments (15)

Hello - Unfortunately, in order to be a surrogate mother for someone one of the qualifications is that you must already have a child/children. However, you can certainly apply to become an egg donor! That would still help families!

Hello I have never given birth or been pregnant! But I really want to carry a baby for someone I have done for years! I want to be able to help the mothers and fathers that cannot have children! I am willing to donate a few eggs to mothers! I just hope you come to me x

hi,i'm 21 yrs old,im willing 2 b a surrogate mother.does that mean i need to ave my own babies,b4 i can become 1

Yes - women are generally required to have had a baby of their own before they carry one as a surrogate.

hey my name is melissa what would i have to do or how much money would we need to have this done

One of our patient care advocates will contact you. Best, Claire

I would be interested in becoming a surrogate, Im having my third child this month. I have a four year old daughter who I have stayed home with since she was born and a soon to be ten year old daughter. My ten year old daughter was adopted because I was 15 when I had her. Im 25 now and plan to stay home with the new baby for at least three years and could really use extra income so I can stay home. I have also seen my ten year old daughter and how happy I've made her adopted parents and would love to do this for someone else as well.

Hello i'm 21 years old and i am thinking about become a surrogate, But i have never gave birth before, and by searching online they say i needed to have least gave birth to a child of my own for multiple reasons. So i was wondering is there ANY way that i can still become a surrogate mother?
Oh the type of surrogate i want to be is a Gestational.

they need to know if you are able to carry a child to term. that is why you need to have one of your own. if your body is prone to have miscarriages, then you would not be a good candidate and only cause the intended parents heartache. not only is pregnancy a physical drain, but it is also an emotional rollercoaster. whether the child is yours or not, you will feel a sence of loss when the baby is taken from you. you need to have already experienced these emotions to know what to expect from carrying a baby. name is Angela I'm 23 years old and me and my husband been tryin for years to have a baby I really want a family with him so I'm lookin for someone who can help us out

Angela, I'm so sorry to hear that you've been struggling to conceive. Do you have a regular period? Have you been tracking your ovulation? Has you discussed this with your OB/Gyn? If you have done the above it may be time to consult with a fertility doctor to discuss your options. If you need help finding a fertility specialist in your area feel free to email me directly at

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